We were suppose to go to a music festival in the countryside but we decided against it when our cab driver told us it was a festival for dirty hippies, the music sucked and GET THIS- they had a CHOLERA outbreak last year. What???? Cholera!!!!!! Really? That does seem to further authenticate our medieval times experience in this awesome walled city but we do have a baby so we decided to opt out.
We also took Maddox to a super cool puppet show/puppet museum. He loved the show so much he was dancing in my lap- especially during the Macarena act. He didn't even care that the show was in Estonian. After the show and a quick tour of the medieval town hall we went to an indoor water park. Maddox is certainly a water baby. He met a cute Estonian baby and they enjoyed splashing each other and holding hands as us parents discussed life in Estonia.
We noticed again today that sure, there are lots of tourists here but most of them are European. How do I know? Well it's all about the length of shorts and swim trunks the men wear. European men prefer just above the knee. European men go for the short and sweet look, sporting speedos in the pool and daisy duke nut huggers I. The street. Doesn't matter if they're old or young or whether they have kankles or ankles.
Another thing I've noticed in the Baltics is most of the homeless people are super cute. I know that sounds weird but I doubt they are homeless, they are relatively clean, and a lot of then are old. We saw an 80 year old woman sing for her supper on a street corner in Latvia and my heart just melted.
However, today we saw a not so cool homeless man touting a full Polish all red snazzy Olympic outfit and I wont be the first to tell you those aren't cheap! He was holding a sign that read "Give me all your money! Send me back home!" please buddy. The only place I can afford to send you is that Biomassage venue, which I have since seen another ad for. Not only will they massage your prostate professionally, they have a "SPECIAL" promotion running now where they will also conduct a hygienic shaving of intimidate zones while you relax!" Seems to me this Polish bloke is so super clean and rich already that the only way we could really help him would be to sponsor the shaving of his intimate zones.
We have a few more days in Estonia before we head to the Olympics! We can't wait so we have been reading up on all things Olympic, including the Paraolympics. I didn't realize the Paraolympics were tinged with so mug scandal. Apparently they have issues ranging from steroid use in dwarfs, people that lie about mental disabilities to get on the teams and others who break their bones to raise their blood pressure which has been shown to increase their chances of winning by 15 percent. Dang!!!! Crazy! If you haven't already do some Internet research. You will be shocked!
We just watched Michael Phelps get creamed in his first event. I'm sure he won't be getting nearly as much action in the Olympic Village tonight. Pobrecito.
The tabloids have been filled with talk of Olympic Village hook-ups which my family finds fascinating and also a way to blend in with the locals. Brett and I were at the grocery store when I opted to buy a trashy gossip magazine for 1 Euro. Then as we sat down at a cafe outside I realized- how cool is this. People will think I'm Estonian because I'm reading Estonian. What a concept! What a strategy. Not sure why I didn't do this on other trips.
Until later,
Sarah
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